A researcher at the University of Brighton evidences and articulates several significant elements in the process of belonging and of leaving an organisation. Repeated actions by the organisation cause commitment to the vision of the organisation come under increasing strain and to decline. And, one day it breaks.
You didn’t take me,
But you soon tied my hands with finance,
Stuffed my mouth with acronyms,
And made me sing your praises.
I hate to love you;
You are all,
The thought of leaving these walls,
Reduces me to tears;
Is the basis of my fears,
And breaks my teeth in sleep.
This grinding from the inside out,
Is mental; you are inside my head,
Holding me hostage,
Against my self.
I know you take more than you give,
But you play the balance well,
Letting me win, just enough, to ride out the failure.
I apologise for wanting
More; for needing something for myself,
Not taking time to care for me first,
For managing my mental health;
You make me grateful for my loss of independence,
Plying me with promises of a better future,
Hiding both the carrot and the stick,
Although I still sense them;
As the alternative;
Is to defend myself.
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This poem is narrated by Lorraine Ansell, a British female voiceover professional.