I’ve been too humble and too many times, foolishly rude.
I’ve been quietly subtle and I have been crushingly crude.
I’ve been overly praised and much too harshly criticised.
I’ve been shocking and I have been measured and sized.
I’ve been written off, then against odds, come back fighting.
I’ve been unnecessarily horrid and I have been delighting.
I’ve been so stoic and then fluidly shifted with the sands.
I’ve been bang on point and I have been terribly off hand.
I’ve been embarrassing, then made many people proud.
I’ve been too quiet and I have been annoyingly too loud.
I’ve been the sole of discretion and played kiss and tell.
I’ve been in charge and I have been charged at as well.
I’ve been defensive with no defence and taken flak too.
So you know, I’ve been sacked by bigger cunts than you.
Read by Andy Denham
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